The Language of Support: Special Needs Style

Support is such an important thing in the life of a family parenting a child with special needs.  Many of us find ourselves feeling very alone and wondering if anyone else out there feels the way they do.

You very quickly discover who your true friends are.   I’ve mentioned before one of my then closest friends whose best words of comfort came in the suggestion of simply letting Parker die.

I no longer feel the hurt and confusion I once did.  I can see now that having never met  Parker, her heart wasn’t as invested as mine.  What she would have done in my situation was  different.

Every once in a while this memory makes it way up to the top of my thoughts and I find myself reliving those days.

I think many of us have these kind of stories.

On the flip side the support we have received since Parker’s birth has made up for those who found our situation uncomfortable and unsure how to respond to it.

Meals, fundrasiers, donations left on our doorstep, heartfelt prayers, our name left on the rolls of the Temple, expressions of love, all of it has been greatly appreciated.

It dawned on me today that after over 5 years on this journey, I’m a bit of an old timer.

There are new families trying to find their way.

Families that might not, for whatever reason, have the support system others do.

Did I ever tell you about one of Parker’s nurses?   When she refused to give up her son she was left by her husband and distanced by her family.

I find myself wondering what those of us who have experienced  strong support systems could do to reach out and help those who might not have the support they need.

How any and all of us could support each other.

  • What do you find that helps you through the rocky times?
  • What was something a friend did that although maybe very simple, touched your heart in a way you’ll never forget.
  • What would you like to be able to explain to others about your life with a child with special needs?

I think more might be willing to offer support, but they are uncertain to how it might be received.  They are uncertain of the way to go about it.

Cause sometimes this support stuff can be new territory for all of us.

What do you think?


  1. Jeanette Mar 4, 10
  2. Suzie Smith Mar 4, 10
  3. Suzi Searles Mar 4, 10
  4. Petra Mar 4, 10
  5. Emily Mar 4, 10
  6. Cody Mar 4, 10
  7. Chris Mar 4, 10
  8. Janet/kadiera
    Mar 4, 10
  9. mm Mar 6, 10
  10. KDL
    Mar 16, 10
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