No matter how hard I try to wrap my head around it, I cannot grasp the concept of being so afraid of something that I would choose to kill a child in utero. Apparently the fear of Down syndrome did exactly that to a family in the southern province of Adana.
Hatice Buzpinar, after being told that one of her twins had Down syndrome agreed to having an injection given to the fetus with Down syndrome which would stop the growth of that fetus in it’s mother’s womb.
That’s a politically correct way of saying it would kill the unborn baby.
Two days later, Buzpinar began experiencing abdominal pain. Taken back to the hospital, doctors decided to remove Buzpinar’s uterus and the fetuses inside it.
The surgery did not go as planned, and Buzpinar died of a heart attack.
I look at this beautiful little boy of mine, and honestly can’t figure out what about him would scare a mother so badly that she would want to kill him before he even had the opportunity to take his first breath.
Not a day goes by that I don’t pray, several times a day even, for the blessing of being able to keep Parker alive. I pray for his Pulmonary Hypertension to remained controlled and to in the secret depths of my heart I plead for his PH to be able to be measured as mild, rather than it’s current mild to moderate state. I pray for many, many, many more years of being able to be his Mother.
Reed and I willingly go without new clothes, new cars, toys, house repairs in need of being addressed, vacations, and other non-essential to life stuff in order to pay off medical debt and provide Parker with the things he needs.
I know there will be many choosing to condemn this family. But I won’t add my voice to that chorus.
I feel such a great sadness for the husband and remaining son, for all they’ve lost, including the beauty found within a tiny extra chromosome. Such great loss all by allowing the fear of Down syndrome to take over.
To you I make this appeal: Never, never, never be afraid of Down syndrome.
PS: You can read the entire story: Injection to fetus kills mother, other twin diagnosed with Down syndrome
About Tammy and Parker
That breaks my heart, I don’t understand the world sometimes. You are such a great mom for fighting so hard for Parker. I think he is the cutest little boy I’ve ever seen!!
Carlee
I have a son with special needs as well. Once I tried to find out what the chances were that he could have children without his condition and was horrified to see abortion as a suggestion. How devastating! I cried to think that some mother might have chosen to deny life to a child (as special as my own) simply because he was missing a gene. On the other hand I know how difficult it is to watch your child suffer. Perhaps that mom knew she didn’t have the strength to watch her baby suffer in this life. I guess what I’m trying to say is I can’t judge others for the path they take, and pray that God will give me the strength to follow mine.
I just had one other thought. My oldest brother has two children, neither one has any special needs, but they both tested positive for down syndrome before birth. I don’t know how often they have false positives, but its something to think about as well.
Twitter: kadiera
says:
A certain family member once told us, when we were deciding between fertility treatments and adoption, that we should be careful because, “you never know what you’re going to get with a kid like that.”
I was stunned.
Then we had Alex, all 1 lb and 7 ounces of him. And eventually a trach and lots of equipment and a mild CP diagnosis and non-verbal (and maybe more)…
And then to add to the drama we had Bethany, not quite 2 pounds, and just as complicated….
And it occurs to me that *every* child is a surprise, and thinking they’re not is what gets people in trouble. The problem then is to understand whether you like surprises or not.
My son is 18 and has DS. He also had a trach and feeding tube when he was younger due to silent aspiration. He did have surgery for an ASD and we are seen by the Cardiologist. His Pulmonary Hypertension is now mild since he started to use CPAP for sleep apnea. Many people with DS have sleep apnea due to the lower muscle tone. I just stumbled upon your website. You may have had your son tested but I just thought that I would share.
I also wanted to share he had VitalStim therapy to correct the silent aspiration after he multiple surgeries over a 7 year period to remove scar tissue due to reflux and frequent intibations. He had a Niesson for the reflux. Sometimes its nice to know that others people who have had some similar issues.
Linda, I would LOVE to know more about VitalStim therapy. We know that a lot of Parker’s PH issues are due to constant aspirations, the kid even aspirates on his own saliva. We dream of being able one day to have his PH be ranked a mild. But I’m not sure that will ever happen.
Here is the link for the VitalStim Therapy http://vitalstimtherapy.com/. When Kyle had it done he had to have a barium swallow test to see where they needed to tighten the muscles. Then he went in I think it was only three times. They put the probes on his neck and had him drink different consistencies. They would send pulses to teach his brain to activate the muscles. It didn’t hurt, but was awkward. This is something that is also used on people that have had strokes. Kyle is 18 now and had it done about 10 years ago. It worked very well for him. He was able to have his gtube taken out because of this. The website also has a link to find places in your area. We had VitalStim done in Kansas. I am pretty sure we had to have a speech therapist do the therapy with him. His breathing also drastically improved when they took his tonsils out. His sats were normally in the 70′s when he was well. Having his tonsils taken out bumped them into the high 90′s which is the normal range.