The Drama Mama: Do YOU Know One?

by Tammy & Parker on October 28, 2009

ETA:   I can’t believe how many emails this post has inspired.  So many of you have had your very own Drama Mama experiences.

According to the emails received, one of the best skills to incorporate when dealing with a Drama Mama is the ability to roll your eyes, and consider the source.

I couldn’t agree more.

Have you ever played the game where one person whispers something to you, and you then whisper it to someone else, who whispers it to yet another until the message makes it way back to it’s creator, bearing absolutely no resemblance to what had been said in the first place?

In my mind that’s kinda how I perceive The Drama Mama. She has the unique ability to twist and turn her words just so. This redesigning of what was originally said, or often what never even happened in the first place shocks people just enough to get them wondering.

Especially skilled Drama Mama’s may get you wondering about a person who you’ve known for years, or know in your heart of hearts really would have never done such a thing.

But, because you want to be a good friend, and can’t believe anyone would lie about such a thing, the Drama Mama lures you into believing her.

It’s an honest mistake. We all want to support each other. And for many that includes believing even the improbable, or worse.

But I’d like to point out one thing about Drama Mama’s:

They always have some sort of drama going on in their lives. It usually starts out small, and then just. keeps. building, with never an end or solution in sight.

You may have found yourself thinking this very thought, but then guiltily try and shove down what feels like betrayal to your friend who has been through so very much.

And this is what keeps The Drama Mama in business.

Somebody who is always surrounded by the fantastic, only happens to one in a million people, but happens to them like clockwork, on an ever escalating scale, may indeed be a Drama Mama.

A person who is simply so unhappy in their life that they have to create drama to provide themselves with a reason to keep putting one foot in front of the other.

Some Drama Mama’s are harmless. They may be extroverts looking for a way to gander some attention. Their drama usually revolves around their own lives and is often self depreciating, contained only to themselves.

Others subscribe to the idea that their misery is at it’s finest when deliberately flung (but with masterfully feigned, incredulous woe ) at others.

The attention received from that kind of drama quickly becomes addictive, with more and more over the top drama needed to maintain the fix…….and The Drama Mama’s audience.

Sound like someone you know? Could be. Most of us have had a run in with a DM or two in our lifetimes. It happens. Life catches you off guard and you find you have unintentionally left yourself wide open.

I ‘d like to suggest that we all be proactive when it comes to Drama Mama’s. If it seems too fantastic to be true, if something in your heart is telling you that what you are being told simply doesn’t feel quite right, stop and listen.

And this isn’t to say that I am perfect in this kind of situation. Far from it. But one thing I have absolutely learned is to give the person in question the benefit of the doubt. Reserve the right to make your own decision based on the experiences you, yourself have had with the person in question.

Without a supportive audience, a Drama Mama quickly dries up and blows away.

Leaving the actual truth in her wake.

Often surprising and embarrassing many who were unwittingly deceived.

And if you don’t believe that, you may want to look at the history of your Drama Mama, and who she has added to her pile of casualties. How many of her former friends have found their way into her path of destruction?

Because one thing I can absolutely promise you; you never know when it may be YOUR butt the Drama Mama pins her target to next.

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Tammy and Parker

{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }

Beck October 28, 2009 at 2:10 pm

I know SEVERAL. Their lives are so HARD and everything that’s wrong in their lives is SOMEONE ELSE’S FAULT. Heh!

Of course, there’s the flip of this, right? The person who disappears at the first sign of trouble in your life – I experiences this myself at first-hand this year when my brother got so sick and half of my friends suddenly disappeared.

“I don’t like drama,” one of them said. But it wasn’t drama – it was a real-life tragedy playing out in agonizing slow-motion. So I think it’s important to distinguish between people who just like to make trouble and people who are genuinely in pain, right?

Tammy says: Absolutely! Drama usually is looking for some kind of gain. Where as pain, well, that is totally different from drama.

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Lacey and Jax October 28, 2009 at 3:04 pm

Uh oh, were you hit by some drama from someone? I hate that, sometimes I feel like a drama mamma because Jax does bring a lot of that!
Oh and the trach has been so nice. He is back to his normal self, he doesn’t need a lot of suctioning. And of course, the sleeping all night is an absolute added bonus!

Tammy and Parker: You know, I really think that there is a big difference between the type of drama that comes from a critically ill child…….and the kind of drama people like to employ for effect, kwim?

*smooch*

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Barbara October 28, 2009 at 6:11 pm

Uhm, very accurate description of a psychological profile. I’m completely lost if you were hinting at anyone in particular (I know of a blogger who’s online name is drama momma.) Meantime, if the Hodsons are okay, uhm, okay!

Tammy says: I think that into most of our lives a little drama falls, or at least that’s the message I’m getting from all the emails I’ve been receiving. This post was mainly for those out there who have yet to have, or are in the midst of, their very first Drama Mama experience. ;D

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kelli November 3, 2009 at 1:14 am

great post … funny, I think about this in the times (like now) when I dont post anything fbut updayrs on my sitch. Somwtimes, in these slow dagging times of the hard stuff, there is no time or energy to post anything more than that. But I d think, ami just whining? Ugh. Almost 4 years with no transplant. I think I am tired of it too lol. Love you. Hug Mr p for me.(pardon the typing-it is onehanded while i do the stupid bedrest thing)

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