One Step Forward…..Then A Million Miles Back.

That’s how it feels around here sometimes.

You start to get feeling safe that maybe your kid was one of the lucky ones.   That after years of struggle and challenge you were going to make it out on top after all ……..with your kid alive.

Then fate steps in with an obvious need to keep me humble and before I know it, we’re back at square one.


I’ve spent the last few days doing a lot of research. Not a small portion of it being of the terrifiying variety.

Tomorrow begins our month of a zillion doctor visits, and I want to be prepared.  Because I’ve done this before,  I know the importance of a plan.

When we see Parker’s pedi tomorrow, I’ll be armed with copies of Parker’s 9.09 cath results.  (Not to be confused with the results of his 4.08 cath results.)  I also have a page of questions that I’d like to have addressed by each specialist we’ll be seeing next Wednesday.

My plan is to get these papers into the hands of each doctor that Parker will be seeing BEFORE our appointment.  These upcoming visits are too important to be simple ‘cold calls.’  Doctors tend to sometimes pass a patient off to the next specialist on the list, with no communication between the other.

This go around I refuse to leave any office before I receive a definitive course of action.

There must needs be some good communication going on between the cardiologist, pulmonologist, and ENT.

And this my friends is easier said than done.

If there is one good thing about all of this, it is that I’m learning a lot.


I’m learning of faith.  I’m learning how to discern between my desires and to listen for and feel the whisperings of the Spirit.

I’m pretty sure that the whole ‘Be still and know that I am God’ was counsel given just for me.

It’s been hard for me to know when the Spirit is speaking to me and when it’s simply just a random idea popping into my head.

Cause me and random have a long history together.  Along with spur of the moment and ‘I don’t need any help, I can do it all by myself.’


Faith the size of a mustard seed? I’m thinking I may need to upgrade that to faith at least the size of a pumpkin seed.  I’ve got way more than just mountains and mulberry trees to move.


Just a few small pumpkin seeds literally took over our garden this year.  Look at the beauty and wonder they left behind.

To be able to feel a confirmation of truth is such a gift when trying to search out the best path to follow…….the best decision to make.  It’s something I need to work much harder on developing.


Yup.  I’ve got about a million miles of terrain to make up. A lot of it rocky and hazardous.  But for this Brave Hero of ours… it’s totally worth it.


Want to enter to win a 2009 Scentsy Candle Warmer and a brick of their amazing scented wax donated by Parker’s friends Katie and Kaylene?   It’s pretty simple. Feel free to spread the word with others too!   TWO people will both win an warmer and their choice of one of Scentsy’s Scentational melting scents!

And thanks to all of those who have already entered!  I’ll make sure and get your names to Katie!



  1. Lacey and Jax Oct 6, 09
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