Many times I’ve been tempted to write the Utah tourism association and explain that they should change their slogan from ‘Greatest Snow on Earth’ to ‘As long as it’s YOUR kid that has to die then it’s all good.’
Allow me to explain.
On Twitter I follow a few people I don’t totally see eye to eye with politically. For most it’s no biggie. We still banter with good humor. I figure that it’s always good to try and see a different point of view, and some of these people hold positions of decision over the life or death of my son, or are delegates who get to decide who gets to hold positions that decide the life or death of my son.
Great win-win, huh? Welcome to Utah. Where delegates hold the power, and those parenting medically fragile children with special needs start sweating and wolfing down the TUMS come legislative session time.
The other night I asked a (former?) Utah delegate, who is very active within Utah’s GOP , if he had changed his stand on social safety nets. Knowing the odds were high he hadn’t, and expecting him to simply reply with a ‘nope!’ and maybe a smiley face, my chin fell to the floor when I read his reply.
“As ‘social safety nets rely on coercion and theft, and the violation of life, liberty and property, I will never change my mind”
Um…shoulda really have seen that one coming.
Especially after this took place earlier last Spring.
Years of working to keep Parker alive must have killed off some brain cells, cause I really should have put Mr. Boyack on ignore long ago.
Even so, hiss words stunned me.
Without Parker’s vent he dies a SLOW and PAINFUL death, I told Connor. That is not hyperbole, btw. I’m happy to give you the name and number of Parker’s cardiologist and you can ask him yourself. Just send me an email.
I’ve gone over and over in my heart about this THEFT that I am supposedly perpetuating. I’ve prayed about it. I’ve discussed it with ecclesiastical leaders. I don’t take Parker’s Travis C. Waiver lightly.
To rub the salt of self-righteousness in even deeper, Mr. Boyack has written a book titled Latter Day Liberty, A Gospel Approach to Government and Politics where he expounds on gems such as:
I’ll be blunt: under the proper system that abolishes Medicaid and relies upon private, charitable assistance as a “social net,” people will die. Needs will go unfulfilled. This happens around the world every day, of course. People die. People suffer. It’s life.
I guess I should just turn in Parker’s vent and watch him die.
Curiously, when I suggested this to Connor, he tells me he has no interest in arguing with me on this issue because I am too emotional. Consummate reply of a guy who knows deep down inside that if it was HIS kid dying he’d abandon his principles faster than any of us could yell HYPOCRITE!
When asked if HE would stand by and watch his child die, the best Mr. Boyack could come up with is that before he accepted any kind of public assistance he would first sell everything he had.
Well, duh. That’s a no brainer. Connor forgot to mention other realities like relying on friends and family for groceries, or praying that a car that’s been around longer than your oldest child won’t break down on your way to work leaving you stranded without even the cash to spare for a tow, or how to tell your child that the money you had saved for college just went to pay for a piece of medical equipment you’ve gone over your life time limit on, how you pray you never need to call a plumber and you wonder if maybe your other kids just might forget they have birthdays this year.
Stunningly, no where in the response above did Boyack say he would willing allow his child to die rather than except a tax dollar stolen from his neighbor.
Here’s the reality, Connor’s principles work only if it’s not HIS kid being asked to die. I suggest that the state of Utah allow Connor the freedom to apply his principles to his children, but offer the rest of us the freedom to risk eternal damnation by accepting help to keep our kid’s body and soul together.
And I don’t know about you, but I want to know how far libertarian my Republican candidate learns, iykwim.
I don’t believe that accepting Parker’s waiver means that I don’t live my religion. But telling this guy what kind of a hypocritical ideological extremist he can often be might not earn me many brownie points.
But what does it matter? Seems as though I’m well on my way to hell anyway.
PS: I do need to give Mr. Boyack kudos for the fact that he stands by his beliefs. If I would have had this conversation with Carl Wimmer, he’d have scrubbed his Twitter stream clean by now. Just sayin’.
Why all the anger? If Mr. Boyack’s opinion really doesn’t stop you from getting what you are looking for, I’m not exactly sure what it is that you’re accomplishing by calling him a hypocrite…..because really, are we not ALL hypocrites?
If Connor is the big bad wolf then the government is the saviour. I’m not sure I am comfortable with that. In saying that, would I make the same decision in recieving benefits from the government? I don’t know. I probably would. But, if this is because Mr. Boyack is telling you that you are wrong and he is right then what does it matter? Your son is what is most important and you finding the best possible way to provide for him. It appears that, even though it is a struggle, that you ARE providing for him.
My heart goes out to you. But I feel that you’re making an enemy out of someone who could be a potential friend. I’ve probably offended you, but it was not my intention. I do not envy you, but I admire anyone who must take care of someone who hasn’t the full ability to do so themselves. God bless you and your family my friend.
Why the anger? Really? If Connor Boyack had his way her child would die. Wouldn’t that make you angry?
L Brown,
I understand what you are saying. If Mr. Boyack were just a guy off the street I would agree with you.
Mr. Boyack is very active in politics in Utah, and influential with the Utah GOP. Me? I’m lucky if can make it into the shower on a daily basis. caring for Parker. His influence helps to decide who we get to vote for in this state. I believe that Connor’s influence shows up in just about every GOP candidate offered up by the GOP for us to vote for. There are a few, like Mia Love, Holly Richardson and Dan Liljeninquist who disagree with how Connor sees the world.
It was only a year or two ago families of children with special needs were told to ‘go hold a BBQ’ if their child needed a life saving surgery or piece of medical equipment. Cool, huh? If I could hold a BBQ to provide Parker’s needs, I’d be all set. Actually we’ve held many fundraisers. Never, ever came close to meeting Parker’s needs. But we did come really close to losing everything we have. And while my 5 other kids adore their little brother, they still enjoy food to eat and a roof to live under.
Trust me, there are enough sitting today on the Utah Legislature that would do away with any sort of government assistance in a heartbeat if they could. I know. I’ve talked to them.
My blog is where I tell the other side of the story. The side that Connor is able to tuck away because his kids are healthy.
I don’t see Connor as the Big Bad Wolf and the government as the saviour. I see Connor as arrogant and spreading principles that could cause the disabled to die unnecessarily. Heck, the biggest swindle of Medicaid for the disabled has come from withIN the system, not without.
I say get rid of the fraud. Address a bloated bureaucracy. Put in a sliding scale. Insist that families do everything they can for themselves first. But don’t take a vent away from a kid who needs it to survive and then call it liberty and hold yourself up as more Godly than the rest of us who are simply trying to keep a kid alive.
There are two distinct types of Medicaid. One is for the general population. It is the one that has exploded since Obama came into office. The other is for those who could not take care of themselves and who’s families don’t have the means to care for them either. (My son’s vent rental is over $2,000 a month) This population has remained very steady over the years. It is NOT what is bankrupting our country.
I also support bringing power back to the States. Except. Even if we disengage ourselves from the federal government, there are those currently holding office, or dreaming of holding office who would vote against that social safety net. They would, like Connor, point you in the direction of charitable organizations and wish you luck. And there’s one thing I know, there aren’t enough charitable organizations to go around.
Every poll I have read shows that the vast majority of Utahn’s DON’T want to cut aid that goes to the disabled. It’s their tax dollars they are talking about. It isn’t the majority that feels the way Connor does. It’s the minority.
And doesn’t it seem a bit strange that for the GOP and the state of Utah to be so very anti-abortion, and then tell you that you’re on your own if that child is born with needs that far outweigh what a parent can afford? Tough luck. Watch them die for the cause of liberty that only a few in Utah believe in.
Every church leader I have spoken with has told our family to first do all we can. Second turn to family. And then as the very last option accept government help. Not a one of ’em have told me that God would be more pleased with me to allow Parker to die.
But according to Mr. Boyack, if a family can’t pay, then their loved one should die, because, you know, it happens all around the world every day.
If Connor was just someone with an idea different from mine, I could ignore him. Unfortunately Mr. Boyack holds the ears of way too many for me to simply say nothing.
And btw, L Brown, in no way have you offended me. Seriously.
If this person speaks for the LDS church, the church has a real problem.
Where does this self righteous man get off associating his beliefs to “a gospel approach”. Obviously associating his book to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Wow. I believe that most Mormons are more compassionate than that. Oh , I know, Connor goes off about what a wonderful humanitarian he is if you say anything like that, but his words speak loud and clear to the contrary. I guess it is up to him who lives and who dies, who gets compassion and who doesn’t. This Hitler like approach is scary. ALL who TRULY need it should get it. Not just the ones that look pretty or get you the most attention. You can not pick and choose. Get rid of the waste, get rid of the fraud etc. THAT is what has corrupted and bankrupted Medicaid. Not in taking care of those that would die without assistance.
The fact that people follow him without understanding the whole story makes me sick. AND you are right, if it was one of their loved ones that needed that care to stay alive, their beliefs would FLY out the window. He is probably one of those that preaches no abortion under ANY circumstances. Then walks away feeling like a life saver but doesn’t want to toss you a life preserver if said child starts dragging your family underwater and risking all of your lives.
There are many quotes from Jesus alone that could be used against his “people will die. Needs will go unfulfilled. This happens around the world every day, of course. People die. People suffer. It’s life.” attitude. But he picks and chooses what doctrine to use and switches it around to fit his way of thinking. Scary to think people like him have any power at all.
There is a little group of sheep that will follow the rhetoric of these zealots, but if presented with all the facts would not go along with him. Problem is he stands on a podium and shouts his garbage while parents of children with special needs are busy taking care of those children. People with disabilities are most times unable to speak for themselves, that’s why they need others to help them stay alive.
I think Connor might not want to speak too loudly about who is gaining Christ’s appreciation. Would he have helped a woman with no where to have her baby? Would he have presented the child with gifts? Or would he have said “people will die. Needs will go unfulfilled. This happens around the world every day, of course. People die. People suffer. It’s life.” I don’t think he would have been one of the wisemen in biblical times. I certainly don’t think he is a wise man today.
Amen to that! I don’t know how that man can call him a follower of Christ when he spews such filth.
I am extremely sorry to hear about your difficulty, life must be extraordinarily difficult right now, and I feel for you.
I can understand how much a person is willing to give to keep their own children alive. I had a daughter pass away and I wouldn’t have even flinched at the idea of giving up all of my possessions, moving into a family member’s basement, and doing all that I could to keep her alive. Unfortunately, God did not give me that option. Sorry to look to my own experience in order to try and understand yours, I am sure your’s is much different than mine.
Trying to be sensitive to the situation, I would like to put in a good word for a friend of mine. I’ve known Connor for several years, and I don’t think he is a hypocrite. Perhaps his zeal and his relentless commitment to principle comes across as heartless at times. As mere acquaintances he donated money to help cover costs that my daughter’s demise incurred. I know he’s been involved in several private fundraising efforts. From that little glimpse, it is evidence that he does walk the walk of private charity.
One thing I explored in my own thought process was the limit to how much I would be willing to give to get my daughter back. I mentioned that material wealth would be an easy decision, even if it meant scraping by for the rest of my life. What about from others, how much would I expect others to give? Would I expect 10 family members to do the same? What if the financial demands of saving my daughter’s life put each of my 10 family members in 10 years of bondage, equating to a human life, would I expect them to do so? What if it required so much of society that it caused other children to starve and grow up deformed because of malnutrition?
These are really tough questions, and I’m not sure there is a way to answer them without coming across as heartless. The ideal would be to save everyone, right? But at what cost? In reality, do we need to have some regulating factor to say “enough is enough, pull the plug”? If the government overtakes medicine, then it becomes the job of “Death Panels” to make that call… and who is comfortable with that or feels like the panel would not use their position to give favors? The only way to avoid Death Panels, as I see it, is to avoid the welfare state and keep charity a private manner, exactly as Connor advocates.
Until we live in a state of infinite wealth, there will always be the cause and effect where giving in one area can cause another area to suffer. If you were a cancer patient 100 years ago, you couldn’t pay any price to be treated with Chemotherapy, or to access many life saving medications that have been developed in recent times, simply because they did not exist. I would call into question what driving force brought them into existence? What is the government? Or was it private enterprise? I believe from Connor’s view point (and my own), it was largely private enterprise, and government bureaucracy has a stifling affect on innovation. This leads me to personally believe that in order to maximize life-saving innovations and to reduce the cost of health care in general, we must advocate the shrinkage of government to it’s proper role, so that people who are dying in the future from diseases currently not treatable are more likely to have an option to pay for the cure, and more quality care can be provided at a cheaper cost.
Government officials can not create a cure for medicine with the stroke of a pen, nor render health care services. Only people motivated by their desire to make a positive difference in the world and be compensated fairly for their labor do. I personally believe the most Christ-like thing to do is to advocate a system that optimizes and best enables that system. I do not think that the current system of medicare and government regulation approaches that ideal.
Now… that’s in an ideal world. There is the argument that the world we live in is what already infiltrated by medicare and government regulation. It becomes increasingly more difficult in order to survive with such a system in place without using the system (some suspect that could be by design as generally speaking people who depend on the government are easier for the government to manipulate and control). I don’t know what I would do in your case and would not suggest that I would know or be in the right place to tell you if I did. I am so sorry you are going through this. Blessings to you and your family. Do you have a donation fund set up? I would like to give to help alleviate your burden.
Tim
Tim, I don’t have time to address each of your points right now. I home school Parker and am just about to pull out a color/sensory project.
I do want you to know that I personally don’t believe Connor is a bad person. Pretty sure I wouldn’t make his Christmas card list, but that’s okay.
I know Connor has done a lot of good, he helped a family of a fallen police officer raise a significant amount of money in order for them to continue on after the death of their husband and father. He does indeed walk the walk of private charity.
But for kids like Parker private charity isn’t always enough. That’s my point. Talk to the parent of a child of an orphan disease it you want to learn more about that.
And I do not believe that he would follow his own writings and choose to allow his own child to die rather than accept help from a waiver. But maybe he knows enough people and has enough family that this would never be an issue for him
I would be much more likely to be willing to work with Connor in changing the system if he weren’t so insistent that it needs to be totally wiped out leaving many to (as even he admits) to die. And that is what would happen.
Personally I believe Connor’s ideas would work great in the City of Enoch..not so much in the world we live in now. I lived in Turkey for several years and saw what a world with no social safety nets are like. It wasn’t pretty.
But that doesn’t mean there aren’t things we can’t do better.
If Connor wanted to create a plan where over a period of time one plan was phased out while another was phased in, I’d be the first to sign up. I’m in a unique position to be able to see the situation from both sides.
Emphasis on phased in over a period of time.
But to insinuate that I”m not a member (in his opinion) in good standing of my Church, when even letters that I have written to those in high ranking positions within the Church tell me that first you do all you can do (we have and do), second you turn to family, (we have), plus we have turned to friends, and THEN you turn to the state.
My husband and I didn’t take this situation lightly. The only thing we would ever accept help for is to keep a child alive. We looked into the cost of a vent. $20,000 dollars. Then there’s the fact that the monthly vent checks would have to be paid out of pocket because our insurance company won’t touch anything that is patient owned. Which is another story in and of itself.
I’ve washed clothes in our bathtub as we’ve waited for a part for our continuously broken washing machine to arrive…..again…even though our Bishop offered to purchase us a brand new machine. But we knew we could take care of things in this situation as long as we needed to…….forever if I had to. Let that support go to a family that needed it.
But Parker’s life is different. My heart doesn’t tell me what Connor’s heart tells him. Which would be fine if Connor didn’t have the ear of as many local politicians. I speak not only for my son, but for the other kids in Utah who require a Waiver to survive. (BTW there are less than 200. Medicaid for the disabled is a drop in the bucket compared to Medicaid for the general population.) And I think the public has the right to know if a candidate or a delegate is a Republican or a cleverly disguised Libertarian.
I support your idea of shrinking government. I have worked with Reps. Dougall, Richardson and Sen. Liljenquist on this very idea. Its one reason I support Mia Love.
There can be a constitutionally based argument to be made on a State deciding to provide help after a family has done all they can do. Senator Lee supports this. His Chief of Staff Spenser Stokes spoke to me of this on the phone. I believe that Connor worked to get Senator Lee elected. (Although I could absolutely be wrong on that.)
And I’m not talking about hammocks…..I’m talking nets. Maybe sliding scales. Parker’s waiver no longer covers dental work. Which, while hard, is doable. Dental work I can figure out. $2,000 a month for vent rental I can’t.
Another place to look is the Medicaid/IHC relationship. Interesting stuff there.
There are ways to do this without our shrugging our shoulders and rationalizing that people die every die all over the world.
We are in the process of closing out our donation account. It wasn’t really being used, and we received a letter from Zions telling us that they were going to start charging us because it wasn’t being used. I do have Parker’s Tip Jar on the right hand side of Parker’s page. BUT this isn’t what this post was about. This post was about seeing the other side, and having a conversation about it. Perhaps I was a bit harsh calling Connor a hypocrite. I didn’t take well to his shutting me down for being too emotional. I can be snarky when I want, but when it comes to the lives of children being dismissed as being overly emotional is very offensive to me.
I take my advocacy very seriously.
Finally, I want to thank you for sharing your thoughts here with me today. Thank you for sharing your heart and about the loss of your daughter. It is very obvious that her legacy lives on in so many areas of your life. I can’t think of anything more beautiful Tim.
Tammy — While I can only fathom what kind of a predicament you find yourself in, and pray that I am never put in such a tragic situation, I have to wonder if this argument was flawed before it started. Your comment about a $2k expense for the rental of a piece of equipment (I presume) immediately brought to mind the stark realization of today’s healthcare problem. I would like to think I can speak from somewhat of a familiar place: my own mother nearly died from a random bacterial infection, and spent 5 weeks in a coma at one Utah hospital after being life-flighted there from her home town. After approx. 3 months she was finally released, and well enough to resume daily life, albeit a life far from what she knew as normal.
The cost? 6 digits. And not a low-six-digit number, either. It was all but devastating for my parents, who were self-employed and without health insurance. Due to my father’s business (and his assets in this business totaling slightly more than $6k) he was ineligible for the hospital’s charitable assistance program. The bills, collection of said bills, collection calls, court-ordered seizures, eventual closing of the business, stress, pain, frustration and tears wreaked tremendous havoc on their lives.
And all this because my parents didn’t have insurance — not by choice, but because they were ineligible due to ‘pre-existing conditions’, which caused the price of insurance to be prohibitively high for their income level (thousands of dollars a month). Was it worth it to keep my mother alive? Come on — no questions asked. Was the treatment worth the price they were asking? No way. I’m not blaming the doctors, at least not completely. Nor am I placing the brunt of the blame on the insurance companies. And it’s not totally the consumers’ fault. The blame goes to all three. (You could lump all the politicians, education, and even IHC in there if you wanted)
The problem is that we are working and living in a broken system. What happened when home loans became more readily available, and legislation was written to force more compulsory loans be made to the lower-income buyers against better fiscal sense? Home prices soared. What happened when student loans took root in the U.S.? “Higher education” costs more than quadrupled. What happened when health insurance became a mainstay, and every Tom, Jane, and Suzie demanded a $5 co=pay to spend an hour with the doctor so he could tell them it was the common cold, and to wait 7-10 days? Health insurance sky-rocketed. I could come up with hundreds of examples, but those must suffice. We have asked for a deferral of costs, and that inevitably will always cost more. Our’s is a huge part of the problem, and without acknowledging that (and factoring it into the solution), we will never find the answers we are looking for.
Connor and his comrades are right: compulsory anything for the better good of someone else is anti-freedom. You are right: fighting for the life of a child is noble and right. Neither of you are each other’s enemies. The enemy is a national lack of education (true education), a shared apathy for taking responsibility for oneself, and the ignorance from seeing that a system that is not built on these inflating dependencies is a system that is much more beneficial for everyone. Sure, you can’t afford a $2k/month vent rental. But in a system that enabled your dollars to be traded fairly for the things they were buying (1:1 ratio), rather than the inflated cost of things now, you might just be able to afford those things on your own efforts, or those of the friends and family around you. Compulsory aid is more costly for everyone, including your own self. Don’t we all want to be able to say we paid for our own home, our own education, our own healthcare, and the myriad of other things in our lives?
Taking responsibility is the first step, and that is what Connor is getting at. If it’s not, it’s what he SHOULD be getting at, because without that we will never have a fair system. If you aren’t in favor of a system where a fair price is asked for fair treatment, then you are a leech. But I don’t think that’s the case. I think you are a caring mother who is struggling to provide aid to your son in an environment that came long before you or he, and which has become unfair without your consent. You may be stuck needing to hold out your hand in this situation (lest you merely let your son die) but that doesn’t mean you are best served to support that system as it stands.
Your enemy is a society’s willingness to let the broken system live another day, or to allow the ‘experts’ to fix it. To this end, I think Tim has keenly observed the dilemma.
Ron, thank you. Seriously, thank you. You are correct on so many levels. Our stories sound a lot a like, except that we DID have health insurance and still couldn’t afford the co-pays and what our insurance didn’t cover.
I was recently told that several local hospitals, in a bid for Utah medicaid dollars, offered new mothers paying their bills via medicaid free manicures and pedicures. This story was related to me by a Utah Senator who recently stepped down to run for Congress.
As I explained above, Parker’s vent has been paid for almost 4 times now. IHC has made their money plus a whole lot more considering the price they paid for that vent is way less than I would have paid for it. And while on the topic of IHC, the same Senator told me of lavish dinners put on by IHC, but NOT paid for by IHC. Friends we know in high places in IHC tell us of exotic locals where meetings are hosted, spouses are paid for of course.
Reed and I hope one day to be able to climb out of the credit card debt that we put our medical bills on once we used up our savings. Then we can take that money and perhaps purchase a vent. Thus taking our footprint off Medicaid that much more. Then perhaps our next purchase could be an concentrator that we could fill our own oxygen bottles with.
We are doing what we can, while still trying to keep Parker alive.
We are charged $5.00 for each trach nose Parker gets. You can see his trach noses in the pictures where the green thing connects to his oxygen tubing. I was told by someone working in ordering that PCMC (owned by IHC) pays less than a nickle a piece for these.
Another example is the medication by brother in law used when he was first diagnosed with MM. This same med had once been given to pregnant women for morning sickness, but hadn’t been tested well enough and cause many issues in the fetus. So the med was pulled. When it was reintroduced (20+ years later) the price was THROUGH THE ROOF. The pharmacist wouldn’t even order it in without cash before hand. My BIL couldn’t afford the co-pay without some big fund raisers. How does a once VERY inexpensive medication become so expensive?
A step by step approach is the only way Reed and I know how to go about this without stopping all of Parker’s meds and equipment support.
We recognize where this waiver money comes from and are very respectful of that. There are many things we could get ‘free’ but we choose not to because we CAN afford those things. WE DO TRY.
I am willing to work on a solution to a broken system. But to simply say that it is wrong and must end now, is in my opinion not the way to go about it. It’s a fix that needs to be thought out and put into place step by step over a period of time. I don’t think Connor agrees with this idea. I believe (but could be wrong) that for him it needs to end and end now, even if it does cost lives.
He believes the system is inherently evil and must end now. I believe that while flawed, can’t simply be immediately ended without something else first put into place, and a fair price for fair treatment sounds like a great place to start. But just ending all safety nets isn’t going automatically create that scenario, imho.
Thank you again for sharing your story with me, and for not automatically thinking the worst of us.
As a tax payer, I find it incredibly frustrating that my dollars unwillingly go to kill babies every day and, yet, it’s suppose to be “wrong” to help a child like Parker? My tax dollars going to Parker would be money more than well spent.
Praying for you, Parker, and our leaders….
Tammy,
I feel for you, and I’m sorry that you have this burden to carry. However, I think that while you seem to be well-intended, you are missing a very big piece of the picture.
The system of taxation and redistribution is not only unconstitutional, it is immoral. There is no difference in you simply going to your neighbors house and taking money out of his/her wallet. Some how, some where, Americans bought this bill of goods that if they have need, then the taking of the fruits of another is OK. It’s not. Need does not justify theft.
Before this corrupt system was in place, people received the medical care they needed– doctors gave free medical care or accepted whatever form of payment a person could manage. They weren’t in it for the big bucks… they cared for others and wanted to contribute to their communities. We have lost our way as a Christian society.
If the government were not taking 1/3 of your income in taxes, what would your bank account look like? If insurance companies were not around to “set” prices and cut deals with medical providers, then the cost of health care would have to be affordable. If insurance didn’t exist, medical prices would have to be adjusted or doctors would get no business–
I’m rambling… I’ll try to leave you with a clear point: the problem is not men like Mr. Boyack who are trying to get rid of a corrupt system… the problem is the corrupt system that has turned Americans into paupers, beggars, and opportunists. The government takes from us, and then we look for ways to take back. We should not be faced with such things.
Getting rid of the corrupt system would not rid you of your financial stains completely, but having more of your own money in your pocket would be a good start. Righting the wrongs of redistribution is just a start– we need to look to our family, friends, community charities and churches in our time of need. Our government should serve one purpose, and one purpose only: to protect and defend our homeland and Constitution from enemies; foreign or domestic.
I will be praying for you and your family. God bless you all.
Sabrina,
Thanks for taking the time to comment. I understand what you are saying.
However, a child born even 10 years ago with pulmonary hypertension levels as high as Parker’s wouldn’t have make it through their first year. Kids with trachs lived out their lives in the hosptial, never coming home. Kids lived with ostomy bags because take down procedure had yet to be invented.
People blow me off on this point. But that doesn’t discard it’s validity.
Science has enabled many, many, many children that would not have lived, now are. And this new technology is way more expensive than anything that was ever seen pre-1960. I wish I could give you written articles to support this point, I can only give you what MANY of Parker’s doctors have explained to me on several occasions. More than a few who were in practice before Waivers came into existence and have seen the lives these waivers have saved.
Now, there are situations in which what you are saying is indeed true. A yearly fundraiser can help say… a transplanted child pay for the rejection meds and doctor appointments needed throughout that year. Or a child facing a one time issue.
For the first the first 3.5 years Parker was with us we held fundraisers. Our friends and family and neighbors are fantastic. We set out the donation jars. People sent out letter asking THEIR friends and family to donate.
Even with insurance, we almost lost our home. Our medical bills make me sick to my stomach just thinking about them. Groceries came from friends and families. My kids began purchasing their own clothes at pretty young ages.
I can tell you the tax dollars that Parker receives via his waiver is NOT the same as going into my neighbor’s home and robbing them. I’ve talked with my neighbors. I have lost count with how many people have told me that while they don’t have large bank accounts in which they could draw on for Parker, they are thankful for their taxes and that those taxes can go towards keeping Parker alive.
While there are more who feel the way you do, the polls I have read, the people I have talked with are greater in numbers when it comes to being okay with their tax dollars going to the disabled.
The tax dollars going to the disabled are a fraction of those going into the general population Medicaid where there has been by far more fraud documented. A fraction.
Remember not all 1/3 of those taxes go to the disabled…..or even into a Medicaid program at all. And there are two different kinds of Medicaid. The typed that has grown dramatically since Obama has come into office, and the type my son receives that has stayed steady for years.
Also, there is a constitutional case to be made of returning tax dollars back to the states and then the states still supporting the disabled. This is something you could talk to Mike Lee and Dan Liljeninquist with. I have.
And you know what. I have ideas of lessening the footprints of those now receiving Waivers…..which there are LESS THAN 200 IN THE ENTIRE STATE OF UTAH.
I’d be williing to bet that my tax dollars go into things that you use that I don’t. I vehemently fought against the widening of a road in front of my home simply to make life easier for a WalMart going into a nearby city. My tax dollars still went to widening that road for a WalMart my city won’t receive one bit of benefit for. You think the Cedar Hills city council cared about that?
*Everything else aside though, if you and Connor feel the waiver my son receives is THEFT, then don’t you think the least you two could do is come up with a replacement program, based on what you have written above, and put it in place BEFORE the program so many rely on to live is ripped out from under them?*
Pulmonary hypertension is a horrid way to die. Slow. Painful. Horrid. Yet with Parkers vent and the medications his PH is getting better. He stands a good chance of getting even healthier.
Thank you so much for your prayers. They truly mean the world. They are what get me through many a day.
If you would really like to help then I invite you to help me get my new business off the ground. http:www.titterpartyguide.com off the ground. Or see if there is anyone near you that might have things that I could sell on ebay.
Because I promise you the minute I could afford to take Parker off the waiver I would. Relying on this waiver his been humiliating, far beyond humbling, embarrassing, and something that never leaves my thoughts. Add on that I am now not living my religion, well seriously.
But it’s not about just me. It’s also about the stewarship my Father in Heaven has given me for Parker. And not ONCE has He suggested that I should end Parker’s life.
Parker’s vent rental: $2,000 a month. (Our insurance REFUSES to touch this.) A new vent runs over $20,000.
Parker’s Tracleer: OVER $2,000 a month.
Other meds: At least a few grand a month. My pharmacist tells me the Tobi runs more than a new car.
Trach noses: $5.00 EACH
Trachs: $200.00 EACH Our infectious disease doc suggest we switch out trachs every other month at the least. We simply laughed.
And that is just the tip of the iceberg.
I want to make sure that I let you know that my reply is not meant to be snarky, but to ask and answer honest questions. We are living two sides of the same coin, our views are going to be different.
Sincerely,
Tammy
And Sabrina,
If Parker were your child, what would you do?
Hi Tammy,
To answer your direct question above, if Parker were my child, I’d seek help from the Shriner’s, the Lion’s Club, the Salvation Army, Saint Jude, and/or Operation Smile. I seems you’re getting support from friends and family– that’s one of the blessings that God has given you. I can tell you cherish it.
I will be more than happy to help promote the site you posted above– the generosity of the American people far outweighs the government circumvention of our wages. If the government did not have the ability to tax our income, then there would be no corruption to speak of.
I will never support the right of the government to take my money against my will and use it for anything– I understand your plight, and do not fault you for the choices you have and will make for your child. However, if the system were not in place, you would not be forced to accept the waiver that you have stated effects you so negatively.
We don’t need the government to take care of our needs– We are capable of taking care of ourselves… love, kindness, and charity cannot and should not be legislated by a government body.
Again, I am not judging you… you are using the system that is in place to help your son. Unfortunately, the system is broken, and I hope that we can fix it soon, so that people can preserve and regain their independence and dignity.
Let’s keep in touch.
I appreciate your viewpoint. I just had a conversation with my wife the other day about the ultra-conservative right wing people and how they will uphold policies instead of looking at the personal impact of their policies. I have seen it first hand and have been bold-faced lied to, on several occasions, in the House and Senate chambers at the Capitol by our elected leaders, all because they have received their marching orders from their leadership on how they should vote after they had committed to me they would “stand up for their constituents”. It makes me sick that such politician such as Liljenquist, Wimmer, Sandstrom, Bramble, Richardson, Valentine and a number of others will vote on laws that affect people in a huge way and use the “financial and social conservative” approach instead of actually understanding how their votes impact people’s lives. I was a Utah County Republican Delegate for a while, but after being lied to and finding out exactly how the Utah GOP actually works (power and prestige is paramount) I decided to resign as Vice Chair for my precinct. I cannot support a political party or any elected politician that operates under a disguise that says they “care about and uphold the values” that got them elected. I understand and support your disgust for political cronies, local, state, or federal, that use these important issues as “talking points” and to do nothing more than further their own political influence and prestige.
Craig Erickson
cerickson85@gmail.com
@CErickson85
I appreciate the difficult situation of a parent in danger of losing a child, although certainly not as much as a parent in that situation. Yet I cannot condone stealing. Christ never condoned the use of government force to take from some against their will and give to others but rather commanded “Thou shalt not steal.” He didn’t say “Unless you really need it and there’s no other way.”
There are those above who say that Connor wants to decide who lives and who dies and that he’s like Hitler. If Parker’s parents had a rich neighbor and were regularly breaking into the neighbor’s house to steal money for Parker’s treatment, and the neighbor finally cracked down and said “Enough is enough, no more!” would you say that the neighbor is a Hitler and wants to kill Parker? And yet what is the difference, other than that the crime is couched within the false legitimacy of a government program? If I would not steal from my neighbor to take care of my sick child, how is it any different if the government does it for me?
There also seem to be a lot of people above who don’t understand the difference between charity and government programs. They don’t understand that because some people don’t want the government to do something, this doesn’t mean they are against that something. As Bastiat said “Socialism, like the ancient ideas from which it springs, confuses the distinction between government and society. As a result of this, every time we object to a thing being done by government, the socialists conclude that we object to its being done at all. We disapprove of state education. Then the socialists say that we are opposed to any education. We object to a state religion. Then the socialists say that we want no religion at all. We object to a state-enforced equality. Then they say that we are against equality. And so on, and so on. It is as if the socialists were to accuse us of not wanting persons to eat because we do not want the state to raise grain.”
I am not against charity. I do not want Parker to die. I want Parker to receive the care he needs. But I also don’t want to steal in order to provide those things, and that is what government medical programs are. A person of integrity cannot be in favor of government programs that take from one group, by force, and give to another, and also say they are against theft at the same time.
Joshua,
Perhaps you don’t understand that there are thousands in this state who don’t see their tax dollars going to Medicaid waivers as be robbed. They would NOT want waivers dissolved. Just because YOU might not be one of them doesn’t change that fact…..or make you ANY more righteous.
And how do you know that you are interpreting Christ’s words correctly? Cause my leaders support Parker’s Waiver.
The Church’s stand is:
1. Do all you can for yourself.
2. Turn to family. (we also received help from friends)
3. THEN turn to government when every other avenue has been exhausted.
Don’t like that? Take it up with the leaders of the Church.
And maybe YOU don’t understand, but several times above I’ve pointed out that there isn’t enough charity that we have been able to find to keep Parker alive. We petitioned PCMC, IHC, and many, many other organizations.
BTW, I want my tax dollars back from the roads you drive on, and everything in your home that has been subsidized by the government. Do know how many businesses are subsidized by the government? Do some research. Ever used a public library? Have you or your children ever eaten even ONE school lunch? Or drank milk from a farmer who’s farm has been subsidized by the government.? How about the grain that your bread was made from? Sure that wasn’t subsidized. Or do you grow your own everything. And I do mean everything.
Did you go to college? Did you tell them that you wanted to pay any amount that the state may be subsidizing your education?
Do you go to the doctor? Have you benefited from ANY medical advancement from programs subsidized by the government? What about pain medication? Anyone in your family ever use pain medication?
I’ve been robbed again.
Do you know how many technological advancements were made during the Apollo program? A government subsidized program, big guy. Ones that I can safely bet you have benefited from…. and I bet you have sinned and partaken of. And yet YOU STILL SAY you are against theft.
My friend, you are a THIEF. Oh, maybe you are against the programs that made you a thief, but you are still on non the less.
And I want my tax dollars back and demand you turn your Temple recommend in, because how can you consider yourself to be a person of integrity? Perhaps if YOU hadn’t been such a thief then I would have enough in the bank to cover all of Parker’s needs.
You and I are not so different. We are both in the midst of a situation not of our own making. The difference between us is what we would demand to be revoked first. I chose the life not only of my child but of yours as well. Even if you wouldn’t.
I’ll tell ya what, YOU find enough charity to keep Parker alive and I will terminate his waiver. Deal? Cause Reed and I spent over THREE YEARS trying to do exactly that.
How about you put YOUR charity where your ridiculously self righteous opinions spout from. There’s a tip jar directly to your right. :0) I can give you a run down of our monthly Parker costs if you’d like.
Joshua, there is something you should know. I can spot pious a mile away.
It is not my purpose here to accuse those who benefit from government programs of being criminals. I am simply trying to explain the perspective of Connor Boyack, inasmuch as I understand it, as well as those others who share his views. If you want to understand, then hopefully I can help. If you don’t want to understand, I don’t suppose there’s anything I can say that will make a difference.
The point is that if I rob my neighbor and use the money to help the poor or create a life-saving medicine, this does not excuse the crime, it is still robbery. To accuse those who are being robbed and who try to stop the crime of being selfish strikes me as rather odd. We could argue about whether the money spent on the Apollo and other programs would have resulted in even greater benefits to mankind had it been left in the private sector, but that’s not the point. If I could cure cancer and the only condition was that I had to walk into my neighbor’s house and steal $10 from him I wouldn’t willingly or knowingly do it. But that’s the problem with government, it puts a veil over our eyes such that we see neither crime nor victim, even if we are the victim. And when we benefit from government programs we often do so with a feeling of entitlement, thinking that we are only receiving our due from an organization that has taken so much from us. And because our government has become so entwined in our lives it has become impossible to live untouched by government programs in one way or another.
If I could push a button and eliminate all government aid I would. Not because I want people to die or suffer, but because I want to eliminate death and suffering. I believe more people suffer and die as a result of government aid than are helped by it. We often assume that without government, things could only be worse than they are. We fail to see the great potential that could be unleashed if government stopped taking our wealth, got out of the way, and let us focus on what we as individuals think is best.
We see a government program such as the FDA, and we hear about a drug being discontinued because 10 people died, and we think the FDA is saving lives. But we never hear about the 100,000 people who died last year because a drug was never invented because the FDA has made it too expensive to develop drugs unless they are huge blockbusters that make billions.
We see your son who is helped by a government program, but we do not see the cost. The benefit is focused, sharp, and obvious. The cost is diffused among so many as to seem small by comparison. But it adds up. And the real point, again, is that it is not voluntary. There are those commenting here who would call me selfish, but if they were given the option to keep all the taxes taken from their paycheck or donate it to Parker, how many of them would step up and donate it all? It is easy to make the claim that one is charitable when one’s money is being taken from them and they have no choice.
The sad part is that were it not for the history of government intervention over the past 100 years, Parker’s situation might be a non-issue today. Treatment might be inexpensive, there might be a cure or permanent solution. But looking at the issue this way doesn’t demand our attention. It doesn’t stare us in the face and remind us. And so we focus on the short-term, the here and now, and then we suffer not even realizing what might have been.
I’m not going to fault you Tammy. My beef is not with you. You do whatever you feel is right. My beef is with a system that has institutionalized crime and made it seem as though it is nothing wrong, and if I can see that system abolished, I will, because I think in the long run it will help a much greater number than it will hurt, although I freely admit such an adjustment would hurt. I am not against charity, I am only against forced charity, which is really no form of charity at all. I rejected that plan in the pre-mortal existence, and I’m not going to accept it here.
BTW Joshua-If I could cure cancer and the only condition was that I had to walk into my neighbor’s house and steal $10 from him I Would do it in a heartbeat! AND I am sure they would forgive me. I am sure they would be thrilled actually. What a ridiculous analogy.
What if it were $100,000 and doing so would cause your neighbor to lose his house? What if doing so meant your neighbors children couldn’t go to college? Would you steal from your neighbor if you knew they would resent you for it and consider you a thief? Would you be willing to steal $10 from everyone in the country? I’m just curious if you have any limit as to how far you would go.
Just know that Connor does not speak for the LDS Church or even a majority of its members. We are so quick to embrace justice and forget all about mercy! I was so touched yesterday by a discussion on becoming holy and becoming a saint. Someday, we will live in a society where we will ALL sell everything we have for the benefit of those that need. Until then, thank God for the safety nets that the government provides.
Natalie, thank you. So much, thank you.
Tammy, I think the difference between public roads and public libraries and medical care for individuals is the word “public”. Road maintenance, books for everyone, science that helps everyone, the defense of our nation are what taxes are for: to provide for the common defense and the common good. Public schools provide for the common good by helping the next generation become educated and self-sufficient. The medical treatments for one individual that well exceed that individual’s future contributions to their community do not constitute the common good. Parker is wonderful, he has charm and he has enriched your life. But, has he contributed to the well-being of every person who has paid for his medical treatments? Consider all the people in Utah receiving Medicare. Divide the number all the people in Utah paying for medicare by that number. That’s the number of people that must work everyday and pay taxes everyday for Parker to get his medical treatments. What does that add up to for each family? Is that a father that has to work an additional four hours a week every week for Parker? Four hours that he can’t spend with his kids because taxes are so high? All for a kid he may not even know. I know it seems like “it’s just government money”, but that money doesn’t come from no where. Every dollar represents the work of someone else. And, they may not want to bleed anymore.
Jennifer,
You miss a couple of points:
It’s NOT just Parker on the receiving end. It’s called a public safety net……not a Parker only safety net. There are plenty of things my taxes pay for that I do use. Such as the state subsidy of businesses coming in the state. I’m part of the public, that’s not helping me any.
There are MANY who would argue with you on the public school issue. Many of them have commented on this post. And what about those kids who go through the public school system to only commit crimes, and spend time, if not their lives in jail.
You have NO idea what my son’s future contributions could be and how in the world do you know the impact my son will make on the common good? Are you referring to the extra chromosome with that statement?
You still didn’t address the HUGE farming subsidies. Or those who don’t purchase other items that have been federally enriched.
You are confusing TWO totally different kinds of Medicaid. There is the Medicaid that the general population receives. Those numbers vastly outpace the number of children on Waivers. So right then and there you’re Math is flawed.
Everything goes through our private insurance first, so strike two on your Math.
And the fact that the chance that even ONE RED CENT of your money comes to Parker is incredibly low. So you should feel much better that a life you don’t even deem worth living isn’t getting any of YOUR money. AND, happily for you, there are less than 200 children on Waivers in the ENTIRE state of Utah.
You also fail to take in those in this state who WILLINGLY and happily pay the taxes that kids on the waiver receive. Do those individuals have no say in our society? I’m willing to bet that you are in the minority here, not the majority.
Here’s the deal. We could argue this all day.
There are ways to address the issues compassionately. I’ve listed several above. The system is broken. That $2,000 monthly rent on Parker’s vent has so far paid for it FOUR TIMES over, insuring that my insurance company has made an exceptionally hefty profit off of it. Especially considering they purchased it for MUCH less than I could.
Check out the buddy system between Medicaid in this state and private insurance.
I’ve put time and effort backing those working to fix that system while still providing safety NETS…..not hammocks…..NETS for those whose lives are at risk without them. And you know what, there are leading experts on the Constitution that are making the case for sate funded (untangled from any federal everything) help for those who can’t help themselves.
How about at least putting some time and effort into fix a broken system before declaring that my son’s life isn’t worth the money that has been spent on him. And I STILL can’t get past the thought that it’s that extra chromosome you are referring to…..
My parents and I lived in Turkey for several years. One day my Dad and some Turkish friends came upon a beggar. My Dad stopped to give this beggar a few lira, while at the same time those he was with criticized my Dad and spit on the beggar. They beggars only words: Here but for the Grace of God go you.
BTW, Jennifer, I emailed you at noone@gmail.com. As I thought, it came right back to me. You’ll forgive me if I choose not to take the comments of those who can’t even come out and publicly reveal themselves with much respect.
Dear Tammy,
I hope you will forgive me for not giving my true e-mail out. I try to protect that as much as possible in all cases on the web and will refrain from commenting on your blog hereafter.
I never said that I thought Parker’s life was not worth living. I was trying to make a point about the purposes of taxes and what constitutes public use and services available to every citizen. Also, I could not agree more about the waste and abuse in our current system.
Someone said that we should consider soldiers, sanitation workers, teachers, anyone paid from the community taxes as “thieves” and I think that is an obvious fallacy. Those people are paid in public funds for performing a service. The community receives something in return.
My other point was that there are a huge number of deserving people needing public funds, autistic children that need therapy, families with a parent with Multiple Sclarosis, the many working but under-insured families out there. The pool of deserving people is very large and unfortunately growing faster than the pool of people paying into the system. We have to achieve balance in some way.
My question about Parker’s contributions to the common good should have been phrased more carefully, but I still think it is a valid point. I have always thought that the total life-time amount of public money spent on one individual (myself included) should be less than the amount that person pays into the public system. I think that would be fair. Middle-class families paying significant taxes should receive better public health coverage than those on welfare who should be entitled to basic services. Do you believe that Parker will be paying taxes as an adult? Will his total tax contributions be more than he has received? That’s all. I am sure he contributes to your life in infinitely many ways, but that is a gift bestowed on you and your family, not the community at large.
Wow. Seriously Jennifer, my mouth is dropping at how harsh your words sound… spend less than 30 seconds with ANY special needs child and you will see the “gift bestowed” by their lives on the community NOT just on the family…I’ve seen more life change happen in families and in communities because they have had the impact of ONE special needs child.
I’ve seen just one of these very special children has broken down prejudicial barriers, ONE child has softened hearts, ONE child’s life – a child that supposedly “can’t give back” has transformed the heart of a community.
Can’t give back? Can’t contribute to the community? HOGWASH. The value of a person’s life is not determined by if they can pay taxes nor is “contribution to the common good” limited to an individual’s ability to pay taxes.
I have actually. I was nearly drowned by a teen with downs syndrome who didn’t realize that you can’t hold a smaller child underwater. Special needs doesn’t not always an angel make.
Oh, how could I forget about the young adult with downs in my martial arts class. He cornered me alone in the admin office and wanted to talk about his sexual feelings. He said, and I quote, “I want to have sex. I really want to have sex.” I told him very nicely that he needed to talk to a trusted adult male and that I was not an appropriate person to have this discussion with. But, again, no wings here, no halo.
Everyone seems to think about how wonderful families with downs syndrome kids are, but has anyone asked the kids what they think? This guy was smart, he knew he was slower than everyone else and frankly, he was quite angry about it. Lest you think it was because anyone bullied him, put your mind at easy. He was treated with great respect and total kindness, the school instructor would not have tolerated so much as an unkind word. But, he didn’t enjoy being “special needs”. He was frustrated.
Well it is all clear now. Jennifer does not like people with Down syndrome.
Are they all Angels? Nope, not even close. Do they all have wings and halos? Actually I haven’t seen even one with either of those things. Do they deserve to live.? Ya, I think they probably do. Interesting that it took you 2 hours to conjure up that second story.
Thank God you have not been given a child with Down syndrome! No child deserves to have you as a Mother. I can just imagine what compassionate, tolerant, loving children you must be raising. Hopefully you don’t have any.
I wish I had your email Saint Jennifer because I have a few things I would like to say to you that no one else here deserves to have to see.
I meant to say “No child with special needs deserves to have you as a Mother. Freudian Slip I guess.
Jennifer,
I’m going to ask you an honest question. Do you live anywhere near me in a position where you may have to work with Parker?
You don’t have to tell me exactly where. Although I will tell you I have friends who have offered to discover that very thing.
If you are someone I many know in real life I am going to sincerely ask you to respect my wishes to never have you work with Parker. I don’t do this out of meanness. I just don’t think you have the experience to understand this population. Children with Down syndrome are very sensitive and can easily tell who likes them and who does not.
The young man you describe was indeed inappropriate, but please remember that along with Down syndrome comes intellectual disabilities and an extra chromosome does not mean that tacit may be the strong suit of a young man with Down syndrome. Your response was a good one. I would have take it one step further and talked with the parents, who then could have worked with their son on these specifics.
Parker can absolutely plan on working one day. Perhaps not in a high paying position, but one that will require taxes to be removed.
Please make sure you read this part: I don NOT believe in cadillac plans for kids on waivers. I believe that a Parker should do all that they can first and foremost. And then family should kick in. THEN you can turn to the government.
I can’t begin to tell you the things I have sold, including a beloved train table, furniture. I sold every scrap booking item I owned. And at one time scrapping was my heart. I’ve sold clothing. I’ve sold paintings. I’ve sold a juicer, a computer, a fussball table my children had recently received as a Christmas, and much, much more. I did NOT sale my home, because renting for the size of our family would have cost MUCH more than our house payment.
Parker’s medical costs first go through our private insurance and THEN Medicaid picks up the rest., btw.
I could get free diapers and free food. I pay for diapers and Parkre’s blenderized diet out of pocket. I shop yard sales, and Christmas this year (as well as many others) was provided by friends and family.
What you are forgetting Jennifer, are families such as my parents who pay draw dropping taxes. They pay WAY more than they ever receive benefit of. Part of it is where they live. Part of it is how much my Dad made before he retired.
I could very easily take your argument, flip it and say that my parents will NEVER receive the worth of what they have paid into taxes. They are paying for infrastructure to which they were vehemently apposed and was NOT on the master plan when they moved into their area. Infrastructure that was voted down, but still went through because of who sat on their city government and stood to personally benefit from that infrastructure.. No public benefits, but private benefits.
And yet when it’s a life involved our society points fingers and cries foul.
My Dad today told me to consider the extra taxes he pays to go towards any overspending you may feel might go towards Parker’s life. And he said he’s willing to be he pays WAY more taxes than you do.
If you live in Utah go do some homework. Go and discover that the needs of the special needs population in this state has remained STEADY over the years, where as the general population medicaid has EXPLODED due to Ombacare. THAT is the biggest issue. Not the help the disabled receive, but the medicaid a family who has over $100,000 dollars in the bank and drives a car that cost more than my house did, but still gets their pregnancy covered by the state.
Question why Utah offers HUGE deals that subsidize new business, and even to builders who want to open up new housing projects in which they take home huge sums, far greater than a city will receive in tax revenue. Especially in a time when so many homes sit empty.
Question the phenomenal amount of money that Gingrich made off of Fanny and Freddy.
Question those who’s college education were subsidized and yet after graduating had utterly nothing that help make society better.
Hundreds of thousands of people in this country will pay taxes that go towards social safety nets (NOT hammocks……NETS) and will never in their life time need to call on that help. I believe that the vast majority of those people, even given a vote, would continue to keep paying those taxes. It’s the type of taxes I speak to above that they take issue with.
Jennifer, you have the right to your opinion, but if we do know each other in real life, I ask you to please not be around Parker. What you write does show a disdain for people with special needs, and I would perfer Parker to only be surrounded by people who believe and support him.
Tammy, I sit here and shake my head in amazement at people who consider Parker’s life not worth fighting for, or are bitching because of taxes they pay that may go toward a program that can help Parker. What is wrong with people now a days? Do they not have a heart? I wonder what their view point would be if it were THEIR child who was so medically fraigle? You ROCK Tammy. Parker is so lucky to have you for his mommy.
Penny,
My thought is that if some of these people were in the situation we are in they would do the exact same thing we are…..and then find another reason to point a finger and cry ‘thief!’
Frankly, if you think it’s theft to pay taxes, move somewhere else. Like, buy your own country and make it the perfect zen you’d like it to be. And when you have a child born with severe disabilities and have no way to care for it because you have no government subsidized medical help or medicine itself, then you can come back and eat humble pie. DO YOU THINK WE PARENTS OF SPECIAL NEEDS CHILDREN LIKE HAVING TO GET HELP??? Honestly, it’s like you think we’re just too damn lazy to do anything else. I am betting every single person on here that think it’s theft to take help also thinks it’s totally acceptable to break other Godly laws, like, oh, I don’t know… judging others? When you call us thieves, you are judging us. Period. There simply aren’t enough private charities to help with this sort of thing. If it is, indeed, theft to take government money, then millions of members of the LDS church need to hand over their recommends now. That includes every single government official that gets paid, every soldier that fights for our freedom, every school teacher teaching YOUR children. Because guess where that money comes from? Let me ask you this: why is it not theft to drive on those said public roads and use said public facilities? Theft is theft. Stealing $1 is as much theft as stealing $1000. Therefor, by your own arguments, if those using Medicaid are thefts, then so are those using ANYTHING that is paid for with tax dollars. And think about this: if it’s ok for public things, isn’t it ok to keep children like my daughter alive and healthy, so she may become a productive member of society?
I’m a little confused here, and maybe I’m missing something. It could have something to do with the fact that I’m not Christian, as so many of you seem to be. There seems to be a vast disconnect between what you profess to believe, and the way you live your lives. Whenever someone has tried to convert me to any form of Christianity, the message they share is of a God of love, and of a savior who loved his fellow human beings so much that he was willing to die so that they would not be condemned. Whether or not I’m a believer, that is a powerful, powerful message.
So how is it okay that you say you follow these teachings, and yet you begrudge the money it costs to keep Parker – and many others like him – alive? Aren’t you charged with caring for those less fortunate than yourself? Even if you think that the benefits provided to Parker are the same as coming into your home and stealing, isn’t it your duty to turn the other cheek? And how can you say you believe in an all-powerful, all-knowing God, and yet not be willing to accept that perhaps the government, and Medicaid, and subsidies, are part of your God’s plan for caring for these children?
I was raised – in an atheist household, mind you – with the idea that you can judge a society by the way it treats the least fortunate among us. I grew up volunteering my time, donating part of my earnings to charity, and with an open mind. I would much rather have my tax dollars going to keep children like Parker alive than to the military industrial complex, or to subsidies for multi-billion dollar corporations. That probably means y’all aren’t going to want to recruit me over to your team anytime soon. Apparently I’m not greedy and self-centered enough to be a Republican OR a Christian.
Stealing? Wow. Really?
There is just no way to have a rational discussion with someone who starts off with the paragraph you did Joshua (is that really your name or are you being clever since Joshua means “one of the spies for Israel”? Whatever, I really don’t care, just thought I’d let you know I got it if that’s what you’re up to. I actually like the name)
“I cannot condone stealing. Christ never condoned the use of government force to take from some against their will and give to others but rather commanded ‘Thou shalt not steal.’ ”
How is she stealing?????
Using the words of Christ to allow children or the disabled to die? Again…WOW.
What about Matthew 25 since you’re into quoting the bible. You know, that pesky little verse that says “Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.” I bet you Libertarians (including the ones with Republican by their name in disguise) hate that one. I bet you have a way to spin it though don’t you.
I don’t know how you deal with these self righteous ultra-conservative right wing people Tammy, I really don’t.
“Joshua”, you think anyone who takes help from their own government, to which they pay taxes, in order to save their child’s life is stealing? I’m tired of hearing that so…
Darn right I think you self righteous, bible thumping, if you don’t think like me you have no integrity, Bastiat lovers are like Hitler. You want to decide who gets help and who dies? Based on what? Religion? Skin color? IQ? Disability? What is the $ cut off before you tell them to go off and die somewhere? Maybe you could build a big gas chamber to put those in that cost too much to keep alive. That is more humane then letting them die a slow and painful death without their needed medical equipment/supplies/medication/treatment. Besides you don’t want to see those you deny help to hanging out in the streets all dirty, sickly and dying and stuff like in those other countries. Keep your little world clean and happy, keep “them” out of your sight. It’s easier that way. Kinda like if they aren’t YOUR kid.
Maybe you could get some pointers from the countries that put their unwanted disabled children/adults in asylums until they die. Someone still has to pay for them though. Not that much I guess since just the barest of necessities are given. But wait, you don’t want to have ANY money stolen from you for them so I guess a slow and painful death in an asylum won’t work. Unless a private citizen or church pays for it. Wait, is it stealing from your church if you take help from them? Because maybe helping a child with disabilities is not what you give your 10% for. Do you tell your church how to spend it? I don’t know. I bet some private citizen like you would spring for the gas. A gas chamber won’t get overcrowded either. Something to consider.
Maybe infanticide is your thing for those born with disabilities. Get ’em right at the beginning before they have the opportunity to steal a single dime from you. My son wouldn’t have made it 24 hours without a medical procedure. We had insurance and we paid the deductible so I guess you would have to let him live for the time being. (BUT-Remember when they [people with disabilities] turn into adults and are off their parents insurance they are probably going to steal your money in order to live) Infanticide can be pretty clean, easy and BEST of all FREE! Don’t give the little future thieves the oxygen they need. The incubator. The medicine. The nourishment. All you have to do is put them in a room by themselves and walk away. Or maybe your humanitarian act could be to hold them until they die. It won’t be that long if you don’t give them a blanket or anything. You get to decide if you want to invest that extra time I guess.
Maybe Jennifer can flip the switch or be the one to volunteer to leave the baby with disabilities in a dark room in the back so that her hubby can get home quicker. No one would know for sure who she (or he) is since she uses an alias. Of course, if it is someone who she knows or is related to, maybe that would be different. Ya, I’m pretty sure it would be.
Yes, all this is ridiculous. Just like you saying Tammy is stealing is.
I’m out of here. I really can’t stand to read anymore of these. Joshua and Jennifer’s post put the fork in it. I think someone has his little sheep coming here to post comments. The ratio of *** ***** is too high.
Good luck Tammy. Like I said, I don’t know how you do this. I don’t have the strength you do. Or the stomach, because to think these people might be my neighbors makes me sick.
Tammy, I am APPALLED at the comments you are receiving to this post. People can try to sound intelligent and reasonable as much as they want, but they just absolutely don’t get it. I’m not sure I would have responded as nicely as you have. There are a lot, a whole, whole lot, of crazies in your state. (That’s probably gonna get me some really good comments, eh?). My state has Medicaid issues – in fact, my state is 47th in support of people with disabilities, yet no where near as bad as has been described. I don’t know if it is a state thing or a church thing or both, but WOW. Now I know why organized religion and I have never seen eye to eye.
Do you follow the blog Single Dad Disabled Daughter? If not, he recently wrote a great post about people who don’t get it. Here is a link – http://www.disableddaughter.com/?p=4238
And BTW, I’ve never been one to play our state’s lottery, but I’m going to start. I hope I can win so I can give you my winnings and you can tell all these a**, er, people, to just go jump in a lake.
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