Unlike my other pregnancies where I had only the typical 5th month sonogram (boy or girl?) my pregnancy with Parker was filled with invasions of his privacy.
By far my favorites are the little black and white pictures taken early in Parker’s history where all you can see is a fuzzy blur. Yup, that was my kid moving around my womb at the speed of light, having way too much fun to hold still for a picture. I remember my OB telling me I was really going to have my hands full with this one.
Little did he know, eh?
It wasn’t until this bun became much more cramped in my oven that we got a picture of him being still.
Each time I looked at those pictures I found myself imagining a little spirit so happy to finally have their chance in a body that they couldn’t contain their excitement and instead spent their time dancing and rolling with joy.
Later on we’d catch sneak peaks of Parker floating on his back with his legs over his head….mooning us all. Now THAT, I thought, is a typical Hodson kid.
It makes me smile to think of it even now.
On Wednesday Parker underwent a colonoscopy, endoscopy, and had a BRAVO placed. We received a lot of excellent information from these tests.
First we discovered that Parker’s esophagus looks beautiful. Okay, the pictures are not for the faint of heart, but we were assured that in the world of medicine it was a thing of beauty. Eye of the beholder I guess.
Next we were shown a picture of Parker’s Nissen. While not as tight as it once was, it was determined that it was still intact enough to fulfill it’s duty to Parker.
The last pictures didn’t bring such great news. Parker’s entire bowel from top to bottom has ulcerative colitis. The pictures show little pin points of pus and severe inflammation. It’s been there a long time.
I just barely got off the phone with Parker’s GI and the plan of attack includes a month long round of steriods. Holy h*ll, aren’t we going to be having fun. Parker tends to put the rage in to ‘roid rage. sigh.
Another diagnosis. Another clinic to visit. Another issue to contend with. It’s enough to make a Mama feel kinda sorry for herself.
Then I remember the picture of the little blur on the screen, the one I imagine jumping for joy to finally be able to have his turn on earth.
I look over to this precious face. The one that starts each day with a giant smile. The kid that keeps getting back up each time he gets knocked down. The kid that inspires me to be more like he is each and every day. The same one who depends on me to not let him down.
I find myself thinking that one day I want to be as brave and strong as Parker is…… and today is a great place to begin.