There are several things I’d like to share with you as to what I learned at the anxiety conference, but today I just want to focus on giving yourself permission to say no to things that cause you anxiety.
Obviously you aren’t going to be able to say no to everything. Yeah, I know. Sucks. Big time. However there are things you should be saying no to. Seriously. I kid you not. These things fall in to the category of items that break the camel’s (you being the camel here) back.
For example. I don’t hold a calling in my Church right now. I tried. It was one thing too many for me. I do Visit Teach. But no regular callings. Yes, there are those who have given me the stink eye on this, but I shrug it off. I KNOW that this is my time to keep my self sane so as to be able to keep Parker alive and still be a mother to my other 5 kids and a wife to my pretty terrific husband.
Callings are a big deal in my Church. So to turn one down went against pretty much everything I had ever been taught. But deep in my heart I know this was the right decision for me. Keeping a child alive is a calling.
But what hit me is the need to develop the ability to say no to myself.
Sound weird? Let me explain.
Often my self talk leads me to make decisions between things like having the cleanest house ever or going on a walk to help take care of me. I know. What a concept. Moms of medically fragile kids with special needs taking the time to take care of themselves.
I find that I need to give myself permission to say no to the housecleaning in order to make time for the exercise. This, for some reason, is extremely hard for me to do. But doing it I am.
Another way to handle my anxiety when I feel it coming on is to stop and recognize what I am feeling and tell myself not to allow it to take hold. You can do some deep breathing if that helps to calm you down too. For me taking the time to say a prayer (even if you are standing smack dab in the middle of Costco) asking for the anxiety to leave makes all the difference. Because anxiety NEVER comes from anyplace good. Ever. If you are consumed by anxiety you have lost your ability to think clearly and to move forward in faith to accomplish your goals.
There were other things I learned and want to explore. I’ll share those in a later post.
How do you handle anxiety? What techniques to you employ when your self talk turns on you?