Last week I received a phone call from one of my son Rigel’s teachers. The call began with, “I just want you to know that it really is okay if Rigel stays in my class.”
Because earlier she had threatened to kick my son out of her class. Which, btw, is not a threat she is authorized to make.
Ah, classroom management at it’s finest.
She went on to say that I wasn’t the only parent being called. There were at least five other parents receiving calls from her as well.
When I asked about what had gone on in her class that day, the only answer I got was that Rigel had been shouting out in class.
Being a former teacher, in situations like this I tend to err on the side of the teacher. The adult. The one who was there in the heat of battle. The one who is trained to work with 13 year old boys in a classroom setting.
The one who should know how to diffuse a situation instead of fueling it.
But when Rigel came home that day and filled in the blanks for Reed and I, we all decided that a change of venue was indeed a good idea.
Today I went in today talk with this teacher. I wanted to give her an idea of where Rigel had been coming from with his behavior. I wanted to let her know that as Rigel’s Mom, I am well aware of how he can and does at times choose to behave.
I tried to explain that this same group of boys had been put together in a class before with Rigel bearing the brunt of the experience.
I tried to explain about Parker and the stress Rigel feels knowing that his younger brother could lose the battles he so bravely wages.
I tried to explain that when Rigel feels challenged, he picks that challenge up and runs with it.
In return I got, “You are NOT going to lay the blame for this on ME.”
Kerplunk! Did anyone else hear the sound of a gauntlet being thrown down?
This wasn’t about blame. It was about information. It was about sharing the best ways to work with my child.
It took me about five minutes with this teacher to realize why Rigel had reacted to her the way he did.
I contemplated ripping her ears off. It wasn’t like she was using them anyway.
I gave up and simply listened.
I finally told her that from my point of view she had chosen to engage Rigel in a pissing match…and lost.
“Oh!,” She smugly replied. “I didn’t lose anything.”
Uh….Houston? We have a Whack Job.
Reed is always telling me how you can’t be rational with irrational people.
Rigel will be experiencing a schedule change starting tomorrow.
Reed and I will be sitting down with Rigel and explaining to him that if the issues continue we will, indeed, know with whom the problem lies. And there will be h*ll to pay.
There are TEN other boys in this class that this teacher is unable to manage.
That is one third of her class.
I wonder what techniques she will use to get rid of them.